My Life as a Belching Baboon with Bad Breath by Bill Myers

Author:Bill Myers
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: ebook, book
Publisher: Thomas Nelson
Published: 2005-07-19T04:00:00+00:00

“AUGH!”

falling into a hidden hole.

The good news was, I only broke a minimal amount of bones. The bad news was, everybody crowded around the hole and looked down at me like I was the village idiot . . . (which is okay ’cause everybody needs to be known for something).

Ben stooped and groaned as his old joints cracked and popped. He dropped onto his stomach and reached down to help me out.

“Sorry about that,” he said. “It’s an old trap we set when there were lions in the area.”

I grabbed his hand and he started to pull me up, until I slipped and fell.

Not once, not twice, but the usual McDoogle dozens of times.

When I finally got out and we’d started through the brush again, I said, “You said these people had something more than food to make them happy.”

“That’s right.”

“Like what?”

“Like God.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means their friendship with God is where they get their joy—not in what they eat or drink.” With a twinkle in his eyes, he added, “Or who is trying to drown themselves in our river or fall into our lion traps.”

I nodded. “That’s pretty cool. I believe in God, too.”

“Then you know what I’m talking about.”

I started to answer, but realized I couldn’t. I mean, just a day ago I was grumbling ’cause there weren’t any presents under the tree. But these people, I mean—they had nothing, and they were still happy. I glanced down at my fancy cargo pants and my $150 tennis shoes, suddenly feeling a bit uncomfortable.

A few moments later we came into an open field where there were a dozen mounds of red dirt piled six to eight feet high. The villagers cried out in excitement and raced to the mounds. Then, ever so carefully, they started digging away at them.

“What are those?” I asked.

“Termite hills,” Ben explained. “We’re digging into them to find the termites, especially the queens.”

“Why?”

“That’s what we came for.” He motioned to one of the men who had just pulled something out and was carefully laying it on a large leaf. Ben called for him to approach. As he did, I saw it was a giant insect. It had a tiny head and tiny feet. But the bottom half of its body was almost half a foot long and two, maybe three inches wide. Talk about freaky looking.

“What is that?” I asked.

“A queen termite.” He glanced at the other hills. “By the looks of things, we’ll be able to get quite a few of them before dinner.”

I frowned. “What do termites have to do with dinner?”

He looked at me and grinned. “They are dinner.”

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